Kellygo, The Hungarian, and The Spleen

Spleeness (who took this picture with her cell phone) and I had drinks with our friend Balasz last night before he left to return to Hungary. We met him about six weeks ago, picked him up at a bus station on our way home from a work function where I drank too much too quickly and was a little overly anxious about making sure we were on the right track home.

The details of how we befriended him are fuzzy, but I'm glad we did. Balasz is a funny and charming guy, and I hope we stay in touch. Here's one of my favorite anecdotes he relayed to us over bottles of wine and bourbon:

A friend of mine, an Air Force officer, told me a good story about the Korean War. During the war, both the U.S. and the Communist Chinese pilots had to cope with the problem of fear of flying. The Chinese instructors tried to solve it by ordering the pilots to undergo long hours of political and ideological education. The Americans? They used whisky instead.

God bless America!

Superheroes wear "cakes" and underpants

In this case, the cape is a bag with the handles around Liam's neck. It makes me incredibly nervous, but I'm trying not to be a killjoy.

You say it's your birthday? It's my birthday, too!

Happy birthday to my most awesome sister, the coolest rockstar I know, the girl I credit with saving my reasonable semblance of sanity, and the first person I knew who would always have my back, whether I'm right or wrong, just because she believes in me.

I love you, Heather!

The fine art of kitsch painting

As I had planned, I painted a portrait of my dogs with Nylonthread and our friend Don. I have no delusions of artistry, but painting is a lot of fun, and it's even more fun when you do it with wine and friends.

Here was the design I worked out ahead of time. It combines Starry Night, Christina's World, American Gothic, and Cute Overload's Rules of Cuteness.



Here's the preliminary sketch I drew, which I really liked. I wish I had done it on a separate piece of paper instead of on the canvas. Tina's expression cracks me up.



We used to have art parties all the time, but this was the first one we've attempted while trying to keep track of a passel of kids. It was a bit more challenging than I anticipated, but we all had a blast. One of the best parts was that Monkeyrotica made us champagne cocktails, roasted bone marrow, steak tartar, and a beautiful cassoulet. That man can cook! Don't we all look happy?



I finished my painting the next day. Here's the final outcome:



Tina thinks she's much prettier in real life.



Whatever. Everybody's a critic.

Happy Inauguration Day!

It was a struggle to get the kids to sit down and watch the TV. I tried reasoning with them, telling them that someday they'd regret missing Obama being sworn in as our president. Finally I promised them all the cupcakes they could eat if they would just sit still and watch this historic event.

Liam loves ice cream

How I make use of my degree in art history

This weekend Nylonthread and I are getting together to paint portraits of our pets. I'm nowhere near as good an artist as she is; we're not even in the same league. But I've never let a lack of talent stop me before. This is Nylon's warm-up for her painting. Lovely! And here's mine:



I was originally planning to paint them in the big-eyed waif genre, but maybe I'll go with something more like this. What do you think? Not quite cheesy enough?

Xmas ... I mean, New Year's cards: The Outtakes

If I have your address, you've received your holiday card by now. (Except for Sue, who lives in Bratislava. I had no idea how much postage to add, and guessed incorrectly. I don't blame myself, though, because I'm pretty sure "Bratislava" is a made-up place.) If I don't have your address, email me!

Every other year, I've made my card through Snapfish or at a kiosk at CVS at a cost of about $1.50 each per card. Instead, this year I printed a 6x4" photo that I added text and a border to, and then mailed it as a postcard, which cost about $0.40 per card. A little tip from me to you, for those of us who might be feeling a little nervous in a financially unstable world.

As always, I imagine people getting the O family holiday card and thinking to themselves, "Seriously? This is the best they could do?" Yes. Yes, it was. Here are the outtakes.

Day one: We're just trying to get everyone looking in the same direction with a NON-psychotic look on their face. Fail.



Day Two: How about just everyone in the shot? No?



I loved this one, but Liam looks like he's flipping the camera off:



Day Three: It's getting late. Let's just get this done, okay? Everyone keep their eyes open.



No?



Oh COME ON!



It's going from bad to worse. Now every one of us looks weird, not just some of us, and the boy is trying to escape.



Didn't we have one a while back where we all looked normal(ish)? Let's just go with that one. WhatEVER.

May those that love you, love you. And those that don't love you, may God turn their hearts. And if he doesn't turn their hearts, may he turn their ankles, so we'll know them by their limping.

Happy 2009!



See also:

• 2007
• 2006
• 2005

When Twitter mobs attack

A blog friend had the most shocking thing happen to her a few nights ago. One of Thordora's daughters was up late and she was having trouble getting her to stay in bed. In a moment of frustration, she posted a wry comment on Twitter about wanting to smother her, and then, I imagine, went off to get her kid to sleep.

One of her followers — someone who initially didn't seem unbalanced, though she's maybe a bit overly earnest, if you know the type — started spiraling into some kind of weird anxiety fit that turned into a self-righteous frenzy. This person replied something like, "To the person joking about killing her daughter, I don't find you funny," and within an hour had escalated things, had worked her Twitter follower list into a mob. They somehow found Thordora's home address, and several people made calls to child protective services in her city. By an hour after that, the cops were knocking on her door to check on her kids, who at this point were sleeping peacefully in their beds.

This whole response was so extreme and absurd that the accusations would be laughable if they weren't so serious. But it's not funny. Someone's reputation has been maligned, and the evidence against her was no more than a stray, off-color remark made to a relatively small group of people. I've known Thordora for years now, and she's not the kind of person who follows just anyone who follows her. [I, however, am that kind of girl. I'm easy like that.] I suspect that the lunatic was someone who she felt was trustworthy, to a degree. Or, at least, probably someone who was more like her than not.

I feel terrible for Thordora. It's not fair, and I hope it goes away soon. And it's made me rethink how connections are formed online. How well do you really know someone whom you've never met? It seems like people can get to know you pretty well through your blog, but god forbid you say motherhood isn't always unicorns and rainbows. Is that the answer, to always keep things light and superficial?

Happy new year!

I hope your day was filled with love, fun, friends, family, and black-eyed peas, as ours was.

Thea just drew a polar bear for me